"Too Blessed" How the fear of abundance and ease creates unnecessary resistance

Hello, My Beautiful Queen,

Happy Saturday! Okay, so your girl was journaling the other day and her intuition spoke up. And what she said was you, like many others are afraid of being too blessed. I immediately knew what that meant and that there was an intimate connection to the fear of success. I jumped on IG stories to ask all of my beautiful queens if they knew what I meant when I said I was afraid of being too blessed. About half of you said yes, and the other half said no.

So I want to explain. How often do we feel the need to justify our success? How often do we feel the need to prove that we have earned our blessings because we worked hard? God forbid if the things we want just appear in our lives. If we work from a place of flow and not hustle, then we're just lucky. And you know what I've learned? People who have not awoken yet fucking hate the lucky because they themselves do not feel lucky.

Luck has nothing to do with it. Luck would imply that the universe favors some more than others and that is simply not true. How easy something is depends on YOU! How in alignment you are with yourself, your desires and your energy. How easy you allow things to be. How in-tune you are with your purpose and how much you allow yourself to be in your purpose.

We are afraid to have our lives be too easy because then we appear blessed or like we have all of the luck in the world. We are afraid to breed resentment in others or appear "spoiled," "annoying," "lucky" or like we are favored in any way by the universe. Because we have conditioned to believe if things are easy we have not earned them! What a load of shit conditioning. You don't have to earn your abundance. Just like you don't have to earn the right to breathe. Resistance is not the natural way of the Universe, it is the illusion of the patriarchy. 

If you believe you have to work hard to earn your abundance, you will always look for ways to work hard. You will subconsciously make things harder than they need to be because consciously it makes you feel better about your abundance. And so you will live in a perpetual state of resistance and stress all because you were trying to prove that you were worthy of your blessings because you worked hard.

I remember being in college and people being jealous or angry because things just happened to me. How could I manage to pull straight A's, drop 50 pounds and still be having a good time? I worked less than anyone around me, yet I appeared to be doing better than most of the people in my friend group. And it's not that I wasn't working. It's that I was working efficiently and in alignment. I was just having fun and I had no expectations or need to prove myself to anyone. And so all of the blessings in my life flowed in because I had created the path to least resistance.

It was only when I began to feel shame for how easy things were for me did I intentionally try to create resistance because I didn't want people to think I was lazy or spoiled. I literally blocked the flow of my own abundance and let me tell you, only misery came from that. Why would I want to be part of a group that would rather see you suffer and struggle than see you happy and thriving with ease?

The only reason hard work would feel good is if you felt working hard made you a better or more worthwhile person. If you felt that it proved that you "earned" your blessings. Because let's be honest, working hard feels like stress. Hard work does not equal success.

There are plenty of people who work really hard and have nothing to show for it. There are plenty of people who work hard, appear successful and are fucking miserable. Now, girl, the moon is in Scorpio as I write this, so you're going to have to forgive the abrasiveness, but anyone can work hard. Working hard does not make you special. It doesn't make you more worthwhile and it doesn't put you above anyone. You can check your ego at the door.

It's so scary for me to admit this, but I don't fucking believe in hard work. I think hard work is a tool of the patriarchy to keep us miserable, distracted and under the belief that we must work for our rights to life. If something is difficult, it is coming from a place of resistance. And if it is coming from a place of resistance, you are resisting it or it is not in alignment with you. Probably because you're trying to prove yourself to be honest. And if you are trying to prove yourself you are automatically not in alignment.

I'm not saying that it's bad to work. You are going to work because you would be bored to death if you didn't work. But you can work from a place of alignment and flow. You can have the kind of work that just feels easy because you enjoy it and you enjoy the process. Because you have removed the burden of the task by detaching from the outcome and detaching it from your sense of worthiness and identity.  Because you are in your purpose and are just having fun and enjoying your life as was intended. Because life is a gift. Not a punishment, a trial or a test.

The real question is why do you believe you have to work hard in the first place? What are you trying to prove and to whom?

PS Queen, if you enjoyed this blog post, I have an entire email community where I provide all of my queens with more information about all things manifestation, mindset, alignment, and intentional creation. If you're working on turning your dreams into reality and having a healthier relationship with yourself, this is where you want to be. Sign up for your weekly dose of high vibe inspiration.

Much Love, Always,

Shar

*All photos in this post are by Amin Rokhide on Unsplash

The Awakening

Good Morning My Beautiful Queen,

Happy Tuesday and second week of the new year. This past weekend was our first full moon and lunar eclipse of the new year. A great time to release anything that no longer serves you and heal anything that is still lingering. And that is what I did! Girl, it was intense. Your girl was hella emotional, insecure as fuck and surrendering to the universe because there comes a time in your life when you get tired of carrying your pain around.

I was also listening to lose you to love me by Selena Gomez and it inspired this post. The moments leading up to you stepping onto your spiritual path can be incredibly difficult. I call these moments the awakening. Because for you to have the kind of dramatic shift in your life, everything must fall away from you. YOU must fall away from yourself.

And this is the most beautiful, painful moment you will experience energetically. Because the Universe lovingly yanks away all that is not in alignment with you and your purposes. Any conditioning that has been planted in you, any low belief you have, any trauma you are holding on to will suddenly reveal itself to you and it will reveal itself all at once.

Your self worth might plummet. People may begin to project your own deepest fears and insecurities on to you. Everything will suddenly feel too much and too loud. I know because I have been there. I have been at that moment where everything I EVER tied my sense of worth to fell apart. I have been at the moment where everything I believed about myself was challenged. I have been at the moment where my own limiting beliefs were thrown back at me by the people who should have loved me the most.

But this is your awakening. This is the moment you lose yourself and are reborn as the person you were always meant to be. This is your first step on your spiritual path. The path where you shed everything you know about life. Every ounce of conditioning that has ever been implanted in you.

Even though you don't know where you are heading or have no idea about why everything is happening or maybe even believe the universe is punishing you for being irresponsible and ungrateful (one of my old beliefs), I want you to know that you are being called.

You have a higher purpose, and a higher calling that you have been ignoring. And the Universe is realigning you with it. I am so fucking happy for you because from this moment onward, you will NEVER accept less than your worth ever again. You will always work on choosing yourself and living your life with intention. I am so happy for your because this is the shedding of any perceived limitations.

So even though it is difficult right now. Even though you feel confused and lost and abandoned and ashamed, I need you to know that this is the biggest move you will make towards your best possible life. You subconsciously chose yourself and the universe fucking answered. So congratulations to you babe for choosing yourself.

These times are difficult and draining and heartbreaking. It can feel like a complete emotional upheaval. So please seek out support where you can. Support yourself in whatever ways you can. Have the courage to stand by your own side. And now that you are moving towards greatness

Much Love, Always,

Shar

How To Co-create Your Own Reality

Good Morning my Beautiful Queens and welcome to the new decade!

I know you are here for a reason. You have made it abundantly clear to the Universe that you want to live in your purpose and your truth. You are awakening to the reality that you can have anything that you want and are asking the Universe to help you reconnect with yourself and your divine flow of abundance.

A huge congratulations to you, Queen! I am thrilled by all of the beauty you will call into your life. For now, there is only one thing you really need to know and believe. That is you create your reality. You my Queen are the Universe in human form. You choose to come to earth to experience the beauty of life and contrast. You wanted a human experience, and so the illusion was cast. It's a beautiful thing, but never forget that you are also the Universe. That means that you have the power to create, and the greatest creation you are currently working on is the illusion of your life. I know this is trippy AF Queen, so don't get caught up here. This is just the foundation.

All you need to know right now is what that means for you. It means that at any given moment, you can choose to create a different experience. As I mentioned above, you are here because you are determined to live your best life and stay in your purpose. You're tired of living the life you think you should live. You want to live the life that exists in your heart. You absolutely can because you can create that reality.

Like anyone would, you might be thinking, well, how do I do that? If I really created my own reality, why would I create anything less than what I want? In this blog post we are going to address how to create your reality with intention. For the why am I creating something I don't want, I encourage you to check out the QLQ resource library as there you will find plenty of information and workbooks on what is going on subconsciously for you. Or if you prefer a more hands on approach, you can schedule your free 20 minute coaching call with me.

First, I have to clear up that creating your reality doesn't mean that you can control every single outcome and circumstance in your life. It means that you can align your beliefs and therefore your reactions to what it is that you truly desire. Yes, there are things that will happen in your life that you will not want. This is your human experience of contrast, which you asked for when you incarnated on earth. But you can actively create something better by aligning with the vibration of that desire.

Let's use me as an example. I want to be wealthy and travel the world so I can have the kind of impact that I desire. For me that means running my own business and setting my own schedule so I can spend my life doing the things I actually care about. Time freedom is everything to me, and that means time to spend with the people I love, time to spend on the things I care about, time to see the things I want to see and experience the things I want to experience. In order to call in the kind of wealth I desire and have the kind of business that I want to run, I need to adjust my beliefs.

What kind of life do you think I would create if I believed the following?
Making money means taking it from someone who needs it more than I do
Life is hard for me and I have to work hard to get anything that I want
Only the lucky get to live their dream lives
I'm not the kind of person who can handle that kind of responsibility

Are these the kind of thoughts of someone who makes millions of dollars a year? No, these are the thoughts of someone who is just trying to survive. They are the thoughts of someone who believes they have been dealt an unfair hand and that life is miserable. The life you create from those beliefs is one of misery and struggle. I know because this was my life and those used to be my beliefs. Yet, I was always surprised by how absolutely shit my life felt.

That is until I realized that I was the one who was making my life shit. How? Any belief that you hold, your brain will constantly look for evidence to back it up. As such, as you move through your life, you will find evidence of the things that match your beliefs. So if you believe your life is hard, you will look for proof that your life is hard. Your brain is very efficient, so you will find that proof. And so you will continue to create that reality because that is all you see and expect.

If you shifted your perspective just a little bit, your brain will look for those new things, and that is what you will experience. If I believed I attracted amazing opportunities like a magnet, then that is what I would attract. Simply because that is what I would be looking for!

What does it mean to create your reality? In the simplest way possible. It means training yourself to find the things you WANT to see. It means holding the beliefs you want to hold and expecting the things you want to receive. Manifestation, self-awareness and acceptance, subconscious reprogramming and inner work are huge parts of mastering the creation of your reality. But this post is already quite long, Queen. So, if you are looking for more information about how to leverage your divine connection, manifestation and your mind to create the life you desire, I encourage you to check out the QLQ email community because that is essentially an 11 week series on everything creation, manifestation and awareness.

What are you calling in this new year?

Much Love, Always,

Shar

How to Create Your Own High Impact Affirmations

Hello Queen,

Happy Wednesday and welcome to the official second week of 2020. Let me tell you, 2020 has had such an interesting start. Your girl was feeling insecure, on edge and anxious, but also strangely powerful. And I am here for it for two reasons. One, the love I have for myself and give to myself doesn’t change with my mood. Loving myself also means leaving space for my human experience. Number two, I intuitively know that the discomfort I feel is healing and release as I fully step into my truth and back up my talk with action. It’s scary as hell, but sometimes, choosing yourself is the scariest thing you can do.

I was talking to my Instagram queens the other day (if you don’t already follow me on IG, you should because that’s where I drop the most content and free live training. It’s also the easiest space to connect with me). I was explaining how I use affirmations and how they’re such powerful tool. I know affirmations have played a huge role in my journey to stepping into my truth and reopening my natural channels of abundance.

Now, if you have been in the QLQ space for any amount of time, then you will know that I believe we create our own realities. And we create our realities via our thoughts, expectations, beliefs, actions and vibrations. At any point, you can shift and decide to create a different experience for yourself.

Affirmations are a fantastic way to help you wire your brain to think new thoughts. Think a thought enough times and back it up with enough experience, and the thought becomes a belief. Reread that sentence ‘cause I just dropped some truth that is often overlooked. You need to back up your beliefs with evidence! But that’s for another day. I want to explain to you the power of affirmations, and then I want to explain to you how you can create your own affirmations.

Affirmations can serve two purposes (and more than that I am sure)

1. Help feel better and therefore get into a better vibrational space
2. Help you form new thought patterns and therefore new beliefs

The latter has the biggest impact. It’s wonderful to affirm that you are a billionaire. It’s wonderful to affirm that you welcome in love. It’s great that you remind yourself that you are a magnet for prosperity everyday. All of these things can help you shift to a better vibration to the extent that you believe it.

But the thing is, most of us don’t have trouble establishing the belief. We have trouble working through every other story and experience that says this new belief isn’t true.

• If I believe that money makes me a greedy person, affirming that I am a millionaire is not going to help me work through that story
• If I believe that love only leads to pain, affirming that I worthy of love is not going to help me believe that love is something I can safely call in
• If I believe that there is a limited amount for everyone, then affirming that I am a magnet for abundance is not going to address the root of the problem
• Because I don’t need to know that I am a millionaire, I need to know that it’s okay for me to have money AND be a good person
• I need to know that I am worthy of love, but I also need to know that it’s okay for me to want love. That it’s safe for me to allow this into my life
• It’s amazing for me to know that I am a magnet for abundance, but I need to work on understanding that abundance is something everyone can have and that my abundance does not take from someone else’s

Affirmations are a fantastic way to start programming your mind to think new thoughts and eventually turn them into beliefs. But for affirmations to have the highest impact in your life, it should address what you are working through and striving to believe.

Your affirmations should eventually reach the point where they are tailored to YOU. And I’m going to show you exactly how to create your own high impact affirmations. How do I know they are high impact? It’s simple. You know yourself best and when you create your own affirmations, you speak to your own truth.

1. Step one: identify what it is that you want. Don’t restrict yourself here. If you were already living your dream life, what would you have? What experiences would you welcome? Make yourself a nice list
2. Step two: Identify how each item on that list feels. What comes up here? Now, I don’t want to hear your whitewashing bullshit here, okay? Don’t go slapping happy faces on empty fuel gauges. That’s not the pathway to healing. And if you’re scared to look at the shit you think is negative, this post is for you (link to the universe is not punishing you and the biggest form of self-sabotage). If you genuinely feel positive emotions, that is fantastic. But if something kind of twisty, or heavy or uncomfortable is coming up, I want you to identify what it is. Is it shame? Doubt? Insecurity? Do you not believe you can have it? Do you believe that wanting it makes you a bad person? This my love, is where your healing begins.
3. Step three: Now that you’ve identified how you really feel about your desires, I want you to identify how you would like to feel about these things. They are on your desires list for a reason, so you must want it. But there is some part of you that is resisting. So, what would you like to believe instead? What would you like to feel instead?
4. Step four: now you have a list of what you would like to feel and believe instead. This is your affirmation list. Take a few statements from that list and turn them into I am statements. Say that something I would like to believe is that love is something I can have and not be afraid of. My affirmation might be, I am worthy of all the love I desire and I naturally attract love that serves my highest good.

These are high impact affirmations because they are tailored to what you are working through and what you would like to believe instead. It addresses both the limiting belief and establishes a new, empowering belief to take its place.

So, tell me, queen. Which one of your new affirmations is your favorite?

If you loved this post or it helped you at all, please share this with friends, family or on your social media. I am on a mission to get my message into the hands of the people that need it. You can help me with that. Thank you, Love. 

PS, If you are reading this on the day it comes out, I will be offering a live training over on the QLQ instagram (@quarter.life.queens) all about creating your own affirmations. So if you have any questions or anything is unclear, make sure to stop by at 7 pm EST.

Much Love, Always,

Shar